His blessings overflowed!

The presence of the Lord, oh even just writing that first phase has moved me to tears.
I don't know if I have ever experienced the presence of the Lord as consistent or as gracious or beautiful or as AMAZING like this EVER! This presence was not brought about by the hype of a sermon or music or a great band or a convention center, or church service where hundreds or thousands are around me intensifying the reality of the my experience with God. The Lord has been gracious and loving enough to pour His presence and love out upon me alone so unworthy. I just cant even describe it.
I have over the past several days and weeks really drawn near to Him, not to receive but just wanting to be with Him because I love Him and desire for my Love for my Creator to grow. Its amazing I cant even Love Him without His help. I am so humbled in His presence when I think of all He does out of pure love for me and the rest of His children.
One thing I have learned is food water company fun and all the materialistic things in life cannot sustain you, only a relationship with Jesus can give you a life that is fulfilling at all. I have never experienced the Lords presence in a way that I would long to be back in it.
Yet this morning I got up and had to leave the house right away (to actually go to church) and all I wanted to do when i got home was rush to His word and love on Him and be Loved on my Him.
I have also experienced a constant communication with the Lord even more then I already had.
Being in Awe of the Lord and His love is the best way to live.
I have learned how seeking His presence is not a quick fix or a one day thing but a way of being. you live in His presence ALL THE TIME. not just for a quiet time in the morning.
My faith has grown and with that has come some hard obstacles and a lot of humbling and a lot of sacrifice. but in the end the sacrifice is nothing and the humbling is a reality check bigger then none other.
I have such a far and long road and learning ahead of me but I am oh so excited to be on this journey with my beloved.

Christmas/New Years:
Yesterday was Jan 1st and also the present day!!! so the HUGE project of packing the toys for the children was completed and now it was time to bless the socks off these kiddos. Agape is unlike other orphanages, it is a family, thus gifts are given based on the children's interest age ability to read instructions in english, favorite colors, and personality. so as u can guess a gift package for 300 children takes along time.
The day began with a worship service. Praise and worship in Telegu and English and then a message by Lynne and translated to telegu by Rutnam (her husband). We all wrote down something in our lives that we felt the Lord desired us to change in this coming year and a covenant or change to grow in our walk with the Lord we felt He was calling us to commit to. Then we (all the children and staff) put the papers in a offering bowl and burned them. It was a real reverent service followed by communion for the children who have excepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior. It was the most beautiful communion!
Then we all ate 300+ people out of one HUGE thing of rice and one HUGE thing of chicken curry.
Then back to the school to give out presents.
my camera died shortly after the process started but I believe that that was the Lords will, as i was able to see His grace and love lavished on His children because I didnt see it through a lens of a camera.
The sheer joy and gratefulness of these children as they received gifts designed for them was amazing to see. I had to hide my tearin up cause I didnt want the children to think I was sad but I was overwhelmed by God's blessings. That people halfway around the world would be moved to bless children that they dont even know with toys, and that Lynne founder would invest so much time and money into blessing these children. So that you so very much for all the blessings that brought all the smiles, giggles, vrrooom-vrroommsss, and crazy fun for all these children!!!
God is so Great!!! isn't He!!

oh I pray for all of you reading this that you can experience the presence of the Lord in your time with Him that I have been blessed with. Its not about being in a foreign country, or on a missions trip, it is about taking the time out of your life to fall in love with your Jesus. He promises to draw near to us if we draw near to Him and He fulfills that promise when we dont just give Him our leftover time.
Make Jesus your priority and just wait till your eyes are opened to the Glory of His majesty all around you All the time...
may you be blessed, thank you all so much for your prayers.
please keep my stomach in your prayers, as well as a precious boy i spent some quality time with today. He was in to much pain to tell me his name. He is around 6 years old I estimate and came out crying of knee and leg pain. Rutnam the doctor here assessed it and is going to put him on medicine. He has some infection that is causing the pain. The knee is swollen and red and the boy has a fever. I came in the room after playing with the boys and their new toys, and saw him curled up on the floor crying. He would cry/scream when a child running around with the excitement of their new toy would bump or step on his leg. Even the smallest movement hurt. I sat down next to him and lifted him into my lap. Want to have your heart broken and melted at once, hold a weeping helpless child that all they want is you to love and help them. so i put my hand on his knee and prayed for God's healing. I sang in His ear and his crying stopped. I was able to fend of the boys from hitting Him, but ever time I would take my hand off His knee he would cry and put it back on. Other boys noticed my quiet singing and came and leaned in to hear it. oh so precious. The part that was the hardest was seeing this child in pain and praying for healing in Jesus name and not seeing restoration. I kept reciting verses in my head and was completely thrown off by the fact that the boys leg was not supernaturally healed. It borderline made me mad because I truly believed the Lord would heal him. So the rest of my evening will be spent waiting on the Lord before bed, asking Him to explain why. I dont know if I'll understand but ,my prayer is that I can. I do trust God because as much as I love this beautiful boy that I don't even know the name of, and as much as it brings me to tears and leaves me undone to see him in distress, I know the God I serve is bigger and greater and has the power to do anything and His love for this Boy stretches to the sky. He not only knows his name but every fiber of his being and He put it there. So who am I to question? nothing... but still it leaves me compelled to ask.... so any veterans of the faith that want to pass on any wisdom the Lord leads you to, you are most welcome.
I love you all,
Thank you so very much